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Marshall and Friends

   Hey there! I didn't see you. Probably because I have small eyes, and I've never been able to see very good. A lot of people call me Marshall, but I prefer being called Mr. Hunter. It makes me look a lot more mature than I really am. People figure that out fast because I yell a lot, but never on purpose.
   My family is full of oddballs. My sister is son is named Galen, and he gets in tons of fights with his sister Clementine; she's the youngest. My wife, Cristal enjoys spending time with the family too, and despite her love of exercising a lot, she enjoys occasional relaxation time by the fire with me.
   As far as my hobbies, I really like hunting with my best friends, sitting by the lake, and teaching my children how to make their lives a little less pathetic each day.You may think that this would take up every hour of the day, but in reality, hunting is my job! Isn't that better than sitting at your sad little desk, watching everyone frolic in flower-filled fields like cute bunnies. And you just sit there. Like a buffoon.
   Anyways, what you probably wouldn't expect is that I have a secret I've kept to myself for twelve minutes. I'd almost say it's a talent. I'll tell you if you go outside and relax for a few minutes.
   Okay, now I'll tell.
   I can make a pinky toe grow anywhere I will on my body. And that's it, and it's awesome. Except that they wiggle uncontrollably, all the time, every day. I bet you'd pay to see that~

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